Sunday, March 14, 2021

Joke - Hey Jim!

 A lady walks into a pet store.

 

She sees a beautiful parrot with a sign on its cage: $10 OBO

 

The lady asks the pet shop owner, “Why so cheap?”

 

The owner says “This bird used to live in a brothel, so he says a lot of inappropriate things.”

 

The lady can’t pass up the deal and decides to get the bird anyway.

 

She gets the bird home and the first thing the bird says is “Finally cleaned up this dump, and the new madam isn’t bad looking.”

 

The lady finds it amusing.

 

Her two teen daughters get home and the bird says “New whores in the house, business will be booming tonight.”

 

The girls are shocked but laugh it off.

 

A few hours later the woman’s husband gets home and the bird says “Hey Jim.”

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THE SERENITY PRAYER

GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY
TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE;
COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN;
AND WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.

LIVING ONE DAY AT A TIME;
ENJOYING ONE MOMENT AT A TIME;
ACCEPTING HARDSHIPS AS THE PATHWAY TO PEACE;
TAKING, AS HE DID, THIS SINFUL WORLD
AS IT IS, NOT AS I WOULD HAVE IT;
TRUSTING THAT HE WILL MAKE ALL THINGS RIGHT
IF I SURRENDER TO HIS WILL;
THAT I MAY BE REASONABLY HAPPY IN THIS LIFE
AND SUPREMELY HAPPY WITH HIM
FOREVER IN THE NEXT.
AMEN.

--REINHOLD NIEBUHR