Sunday, April 25, 2021

Joke - One Hell of a Headache





 One Hell of a Headache

Steve had suffered from blinding headaches for many years, since his late teens. He decided to try one last time to remedy his situation, and went to see a headache specialist.

The doctor said, “Good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache.

The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.”

Steve was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn’t concentrate enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.

When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself.

As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life. He saw a men’s clothing store and thought, “That’s what I need, a new suit.” Steve entered the shop and told the salesman, “I’d like a new suit.”

The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, “Let’s see … size 44 long.”

Steve’ laughed, “That’s right, how did you know?”

“Been in the business 60 years!”

Steve tried on the suit. It fit perfectly. As Steve admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, “How about a new shirt?”

Steve thought for a moment and then said, “Sure.”

The salesman eyed Steve and said, “Let’s see … 34 sleeve and 16 and a half neck.”

Steve was surprised, “That’s right, how did you know?”

“Been in the business 60 years!”

Steve tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Steve adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, “How about new shoes?”

Steve was on a roll and said, “Sure.”

The salesman eyed Steve’s feet and said, “Let’s see… 9-1/2 E.”

Steve was astonished, “That’s right, how did you know?”

“Been in the business 60 years!”

Steve tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. As Steve walked comfortably around the shop the salesman asked, “How about some new underwear?”

Steve thought for a second and said, “Sure.”

The salesman stepped back, eyed Steve’s waist and said, “Let’s see size 36.”

Steve laughed, “Ah ha! I got you! I’ve worn size 32 since I was 18 years old.”

The salesman shook his head, “You can’t wear a size 32. A 32 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache.”

Chocolate Mousse Cake

 


Chocolate Cake

  • 100 g butter
  • 50 g dark chocolate
  • 80 g flour
  • 30 g cocoa powder
  • 2 eggs
  • 100 g sugar
  • 50 ml milk
  • 1 tsp instant coffee

Mousse Layer

  • 125 85% g dark chocolate
  • 250 ml whipping cream
  • 2 tbsp caster sugar

Topping

  • 70 85% g dark chocolate
  • 20 g butter
  • 1 tbsp coconut oil

Instructions

Cake

  • Firstly, line sides and bottom of 20 cm baking pan with baking paper. Set aside until needed. Preheat the oven to 180 ° C.
  • Place butter and dark chocolate in a small heat resistant bowl. Melt over pot with simmering water or in the microwave. After that, set aside and cool completely.
  • Flour and cocoa sift through sieve, stir to combine. Then set aside until needed.
  • In another big bowl place eggs. Add in sugar and milk. Stir until well combined. After that, add in cooled melted chocolate. Then in two addictions fold in flour mixture, stirring well after each
  • Pour batter into prepared baking pan. Bake for 25 minutes.
  • Take it out from the oven. Using clean kitchen towel, press the top down to make it flat. Cool Completely. Do not remove it form baking pan.

Mousse

  • Once chocolate mud cake is cooled, start making mousse layer. Firstly, melt dark chocolate with whipping cream, over pot with simmering water or in the microwave. Stir until combined, then set aside.
  • Whipping cream beat until stiff peaks. Add in caster sugar and whipping stiff. Beat just until combined.
  • Fold the cream into melted chocolate. Stir gently to keep the mousse light and fluffy.
  • Spread evenly over chocolate mud cake. Refrigerate for about 20 minutes.

Topping

  • All the ingredients for chocolate topping place into heat resistant bowl.
  • Melt over pot with simmering water or in the microwave. After that, stir well until combined. Set aside until cooled completely.
  • Pour over chocolate mousse filling. To make it smooth, take the pan in your hands and turn it around so chocolate will spread evenly.
  • Refrigerate for at least 3 hours.
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I Believe In The Man In The Sky - Elvis Presley




THE SERENITY PRAYER

GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY
TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE;
COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN;
AND WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE.

LIVING ONE DAY AT A TIME;
ENJOYING ONE MOMENT AT A TIME;
ACCEPTING HARDSHIPS AS THE PATHWAY TO PEACE;
TAKING, AS HE DID, THIS SINFUL WORLD
AS IT IS, NOT AS I WOULD HAVE IT;
TRUSTING THAT HE WILL MAKE ALL THINGS RIGHT
IF I SURRENDER TO HIS WILL;
THAT I MAY BE REASONABLY HAPPY IN THIS LIFE
AND SUPREMELY HAPPY WITH HIM
FOREVER IN THE NEXT.
AMEN.

--REINHOLD NIEBUHR