Cats - There is no snooze button on a cat that wants breakfast

 

Fruity Christmas Cake

Ingredients:

600g raisins

200g currants

100g  glacé cherries

250g mixed dried fruits, finely chopped

400ml brandy 

300g butter, room temperature

200g dark brown sugar

Zest from 1 lemon

4 eggs, room temperature

300g plain flour

1/2 teaspoon ground ginger

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

Pinch of ground cloves

150g ground almonds

150g walnuts, chopped

 preheat the oven to 150C/gas 2.

• Line base and sides of a 23cm round or a 20cm square tin with a double layer of greaseproof paper.
• You will need the side lining of greaseproof paper to be at 8cm higher than the round or square tin.
• In a large bowl, cream butter and sugar until it is light and fluffy.
• Grate in the zest of the lemon and beat in the eggs, one at a time.  and sifted  flour.
• Combine spices and ground almonds. Mix into the butter mixture, alternating with the fruit.
• Finally, fold in the walnuts. Spoon mixture into the lined tin and bake in the oven for about 3 hours.
• Check after 2½ hours and then every 20 minutes, or until a skewer comes out clean from the center.
• As soon as the cake comes out of the oven, brush with a little more booze. Leave it to cool in the tin.
• Remove after 5 minutes and place the hot cake directly onto a large sheet of tin foil. Wrap it up twice.
• This will retain the heat of the cake for as long as possible. After a few hours, remove cake from foil.

• Wrap the cooled cake up again in a double sheet of greaseproof paper and a double sheet of tin foil.
• Make sure you can access the cake from the top. Store cake in an airtight container for 2–12 weeks.

 

Funny Story - “Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much…”

 

H – “Hello?”

W – “Honey, it’s me. Are you at the club?”

H – “Yes.”

W – “Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a beautiful mink coat. It’s absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?”

H – “What’s the price?”

W – “Only $1,500.00.”

H – “Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much…”

W – “Ahhh, and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2021 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman, and he gave me a really good price…and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year…”

H-“What price did he quote you?”

W – “Only $60,000…”

H – “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”

W – “Great! But before we hang up, something else…”

H – “What?”

W – “It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and…I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and saw the house we had looked at last year. It’s on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property.”

H – “How much are they asking?”

W – “Only $450,000 – a magnificent price…and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover…”

H – “Well, then go ahead and buy it, but just bid $420,000. OK?”

W – “OK, sweetie…Thanks! I’ll see you later!! I love you!!!”

H – “Bye…I love u too…”

The man hangs up, closes the phone’s flap, and raises his hand while holding the phone and asks to all those present: “Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?”

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