Humour - Father to daughter via technology.

 

Daughter's text to Dad:

Daddy, I'm coming home to get married soon, so get your checkbook ready. LOU

As you know, I'm in Australia and he's in the US. We met on a dating site, became friends on Facebook, and had long chats on Whatsapp.

He proposed to me on Skype and now we've had a 2 month relationship through Viber.

Dad, I need your blessing, good wishes, and a really big wedding.

Lots of love,

Lilly.

Dad's reply:

My dear Lilly,

Like Wow! Really? Cool!

Whatever… I suggest you two get married on Twitter, have fun on Tango, register for your stuff on Amazon, and pay for it all through Paypal.

And when you get fed up with this new husband, sell him on Ebay.

Lots of love,

Dad.

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Beauty - Self Confidence is the best outfit, rock it and own it.

Black tea poached fig and plum cake with rosemary blackberry frosting

 To poach the fruit

4 plums

3 large bursa figs

2 earl grey tea bags

120g 1/2 cup caster sugar

Place the sugar and tea bags in a pan, slice the plums and figs in half and place in the pan and cover with water. bring to the boil and turn the heat down and leave to simmer for 5 to 10 minutes.

Once the fruit soft drain the liquid (keeping 3 tbsp to flavour cake) and slice the plums into small chunks and scoop the centre of the figs away from the flesh discard the flesh and keep the soft insides place in a dish to cool.

 

Sponge Cake

 

220g caster sugar 1 cup

220g butter 1 cup

4 eggs

220g self raising flour

1 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp vanilla extract

pinch salt

Preheat the oven to 350f 180c

grease and line two tins

Cream together the butter and sugar for 3 minutes until pale and creamy. then add the eggs one at a time, making sure you properly combine each egg before adding the next one. then add the vanilla extract and the left over 3 tbsp of poaching liquid.

Finally sift in the flour and salt and fold in. pour between the two tins and bake for about 45 minutes.

 

Rosemary syrup

 

200ml water

1 cup 220g caster sugar

2 sprigs of rosemary

In a pan add the sugar, water and rosemary and bring to the boil then reduce for 5 to 10 minutes until it has turned in to a thick syrup. pour into a container and let cool.

 

For the frosting

 

200ml double cream

200ml crème fraiche

5 tbsp. icing sugar

80 ml rosemary syrup

10 blackberries

In a bowl whip the cream, crème fraiche and icing sugar once thick add the rosemary syrup and blackberries and mix until stiff

Spoon some frosting on to one of the cake layers then add the other on top and spoon on some more filling, use a pallet knife to spread the frosting around the cake

Decorate with rosemary, sliced figs, plums and blackberries.

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